Redneck Landlord Wind Chime

This is touted as the perfect gift for the redneck in your life...

But if you are indeed a redneck, do you really need more old beer cans "hanging around" your house??
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You thought your landlord was cheap.. wait until you read this listing.

http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=150506141317

There's Icy Hot, and then there's Icy Not...

" I found this among lots of other things while doing some housecleaning."

This item is way before my time. When do you people do housecleaning- every 100 years??

http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=190409426256

That won't sell at the Christie's Auction.

This dead plant is quite the unusual relic.

http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=270442391351

Bejesus....

Even the kids from the show Toddlers and Tiaras don't wear that much makeup.
http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=290389850495

KGB Disappearing Ink Pen

http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=380087267573

I will give this to my sugardaddy when he fills out my rent checks.

Wanna virus?

http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=380150896431

This listing calls this an "office prank" but then states "still you should not use it on anyone's computer who is doing critical work where any disruption could cause serious consequence"... oh yeah, like we all just sit around at work looking at crazycrap all day.

This is twisted...

and shatters all childhood memories of unicorns.

Somebody tell me why I have to get revenge on a mime?

http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=310218018263

Proof you should never stay in the same spot for too long

Or you might be condemned there for life... and death.

http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=290438728899

X-Ray Spray

I believe this is what those cheesy presenters use at the Award Shows to sneak a peak at the winner.

The video is way cool.

http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=230435458455

Just when you thought you knew every version of Monopoly...

http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=220603663431

Mega Pocket Torch???

http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=250636100087

Even though it is 2500 degrees, the listing says it is perfect for lighting cigars or welding metal. Well unless you are the Statue of Liberty, I don't recommend a torch to light a cigar.

As for welding metal- shouldn't you leave that to the experts with the proper welding tools? Unless of course you are a redneck and you weld your own car with a mini torch you bought on eBay instead of taking it to the body shop.

Tell your husband you will keep your hands off the remote...

Then use this thing to change the channel back to your regularly scheduled boring Lifetime programming:

http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=260602861368

Remember it is poor manners to drink milk from the milk carton...

and whiskey out of your hammer.
http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=280450219089

How much is the US Dollar worth??

Well according to eBay, the value of our currency changes. One week it is 84¢: http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=190396878132

the next it is $1.01: http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=190396532445

If you are buying a buck on eBay, you are either

a) fishing for quick feedback

b) too lazy to get change for a ten at the bank

or c) have been using credit and debit so long you thought cash was collectible

Microwaved IPad- What the ???

Either this guy has too much time on his hands or too much money to burn...

http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=150440194811

Actually I should suggest just that- microwave money. He's microwaved fire extinguishers, light bulbs, and a Playstation on his youtube channel.

It says on the video "Do not attempt." Trust me, if I spent $500 on an IPad with Apps and all that crap, I would not nuke it or hire a "professional microwave operator" to do so.

This man sells these "nuked" items as art, signed and dated. My roommates better not pull this "well it's art" crap with the stuff that's crusted up in our microwave.

NOTE: This listing already ended but since the reserve was not met, it may be relisted.

The only secret...

is the item inside is not from Victoria's Secret.
http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=200406154086

"Look little Jimmy- an iphone for Christmas!"

(Jimmy opens the box to find a candy bar inside)

"Haha Jimmy!"


http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=250628803665
http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=120566985766

"This listing is intended for a collector... who already has the phone and needs the box to complete the set."

So that's why everybody is buying cell phones like candy- not because they want the latest technology, but for posterity's sake.

Hey I have an old pile of CRT Monitors and Brother Word Processors for all you collectors out there.

By the way, since you clearly have nothing better to do, type in "empty box" or "box only" in quotation marks in the search box on eBay. Isn't it crazy people are buying this crap?

Stop staring at my earrings.

I can't help that they stare back.

http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=220602110897

I usually don't like to post taxidermy 'cause I don't want to encourage the purchase of dead animals...

but none of my dearest fans should buy this.

http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=320527296639

OMG 5 bids and $56! You people are sick- no ifs, ands, or butts.

Is this from a Chevy Chase movie??

This is when you don't know your a** from a hole in the wall.

Is this a picture of an a**hole?

Hey there, don't come from behind.

Alright, I will stop cracking butt jokes now.

As if my roommates don't cough enough when they get high...

http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=310217174318

Now that's a ghetto grill...

http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=330401404147

I don't even want my own dog's brush...

Now you can bid on a "piece of Irish music memorabilia"- a hair brush microphone from an Irish music video.

http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=300423966606

You could bid on it or buy it now for $1,824. Okay...

Is your dog an un-seeing eye dog? Then get the glasses to match:

http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=300423977391

These props are from a Irish music video for the song "I still love you without your car." There's a link to the video in the auctions. That song is dedicated to all my exboyfriends.

I like the part in the video when the Scottish dog starts licking his fingers.

Oh no.. don't let NFL players see this listing.

http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=250382312323

"It keeps bears away.."

http://cgi.ebay.com.au/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=360256572467

Some people will do anything to get rid of old Tupperware. Those containers are like old Toyotas- they never die.

Like this listing... it is so long I couldn't get through it. I am convinced this guy is on drugs.

Revenge on exes goes high tech.

Are we Americans so lazy that we can't lift a finger and key up a guy's car by hand??

http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=250257976934

2 year old Message in a Bottle

Hope the writer of the letter isn't shipwrecked somewhere...

http://cgi.ebay.com.au/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=280501710094

Don't keep them guessing if you're a psycho.

http://cgi.ebay.com.au/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=280395109098

Those darn ice cream cakes are so tough....

This would be cool to whip out while watching Saw VI, the movie.

http://cgi.ebay.com.au/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=350290492126

Hurry up and bid and pay...

Before you have chickens in your mailbox!

http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=160432739370

eBay rules state you can sell certain animals to eat (livestock)- but not to keep (pets). It's not fair. Link I believe we could help a lot of homeless pets by selling them on eBay.

On a sidenote- you can't sell sharks. I guess I will have to ship back my inventory of sharks to the distributor.

Now she'll never get out of the house on time....

http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=170483669345

Give'em Hellfire...

"It itches, it stings, it burns. It's like thousands of fire ants biting you all at once"

http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=230369292763

Can't you get the same effect cheaper from motel sheets?

"Warning: not to be used on others without their consent." Oh... okay.

Turn your Peephole into a Creephole

http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=380061924453

" Effective on all major brands of standard door peepholes used on apartment, hotel, and residential doors."

Yeah, this will go over really well at the Holiday Inn.

This IS Crazy Crap

Gerrroooossssss!

http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=380048333021

And I thought keeping your money in your socks was gross.

I'll stick to storing money in a shoebox.... but don't tell anybody I said that.

Is this a life raft for a bug? What the heck is it and why do I need this?

http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=220600262501

Yikes, and I thought I was addicted to soda...

http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=190394171544

Someone get this lady into an alcoholic treatment center:

http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=300412106305

The Oil Industry turns to eBay for help.

http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=180387993685

This listing cracks me up. This guy goes into all this legalese:

"Buyers will be listed as legal mineral rights owner.. [if property is sold] Mineral Rights Owners will be listed on the Earnest Money Agreement and the Deed of Trust... [mineral rights] cannot be sold or transferred.." yadda yadda yadda

Then he tops it off with "Mineral rights are mostly for novelty gift, with the interesting gamble of possible payoff in the future." What??

"Buyers will receive a Legal Certificate (EMAILED COPY)" Emailed copy??? Is this guy for real?

This is the type of brooch you would wear at a Star Trek Convention...

or maybe a Goldman Sachs party??

http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=150438114120

Who knows? Not the seller...
"I'm not really sure.. what it's about but it's funny.."

NOTE: This listing just ended.

Something to pass down to the kids...

if you want to creep them out.
http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=130386911159

Finally a toilet seat designed for a gangster

Check out the photos of inside the toilet seat too.
http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=300328657725

I finally have a plan to get my annoying roommates to surrender the remote...

http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=220593253789

Someone tell this guy eBay is not Christie's.

Yikes this is a lot of money for a Picasso-like painting of Teddy Ruxpin:

http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=190394404058

I like this guy's work- it's gorgeous. But some of it is just too over the top- even for me. Like his Mr. Spock Faces Abstract Art:

http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=190388399346

His Windex Work is unusual- I have heard of "clean freaks" and "neatniks" but if you have a painting of Windex bottles above your mantle, you are something else.

http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=190393268145

And somebody tell this guy Mr. Rogers was not into yoga.

http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=200468929396

Crazycrap is back

I have been abandoning this website for over a year now. I feel like a parent who just left her kid on the sidewalk. The guilt is killing me.

I can't believe it's been a year. I have been busy with a full time job, moving, and sorting eBay inventory. But now that I am unemployed (quite happily) I have too much time on my hands. Besides selling my mother's junk on eBay, watching repeats of ICarly, and waiting for this darn computer to load, I have nothing better to do than post here... so that is what I am doing.

Thank you to all who venture to this wretched website and enjoy the galleria of unusual and unwanted finds on eBay. Thank you to all of you who emailed me your finds and comments- most of which I have not read. I very much enjoy finding ugly sweaters, haunted dolls, scary taxidermy, male bikinis, and other assorted stuff. eBay is the place to find this crap but unless you have a lot of time on your hands and a sugar daddy to support you like me, there is no time to weed out the crazy crap. That is why Crazycrap.org is an invaluable resource and public service to the community. I hope to make this your entertainment site for years to come (but not anytime soon).