Wednesday, December 17, 2008
Look! The Shoe Thrown at Bush!
"Full records of shipment to prove authenticity are available."
This item is only $10 but I predict it may exceed $1,000 and possibly the cost of Sarah Jessica Parker's shoe collection.
http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=270318589298
UPDATE: This listing was pulled from eBay.
If you can't afford the authentic shoe, you can always bid on the replica
http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=140289560586
Lumpy for Christmas
As you add more sticky stamp edges to it, Lumpy will grow and grow.... into a massive lump.
Sounds like the Redneck version of the Chia Pet.
http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=350131979274
Baby in a jar?!?!?
Wow this baby in a jar is commanding $71.00.
Next time my baby's head gets stuck in a jar, I am leaving it there.
http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=200287130435
Tuesday, December 16, 2008
Have no family? Buy some on eBay.
"Aunt June will provide all the details of a current family drama from the beginning up until its current status. "
Let's swap relatives this holiday season.
http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=120350286329
Tuesday, December 2, 2008
Name that street.
What a great Christmas gift if you live near Western PA and have $1200 to spend.
You can even name the street after your business if the name sounds nonoffensive. There are two other streets up for bid by the same seller.
Turn left on cdw.com Lane, turn right on Dunkin Donuts Drive, then left on Jack's Plumbing, Heating, and Hauling Expressway, got that?
What a quaint town.
http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=130269960280
COMMENTS ANYONE? What would be a funny name for a street name (that is a business's name)?
You can even name the street after your business if the name sounds nonoffensive. There are two other streets up for bid by the same seller.
Turn left on cdw.com Lane, turn right on Dunkin Donuts Drive, then left on Jack's Plumbing, Heating, and Hauling Expressway, got that?
What a quaint town.
http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=130269960280
COMMENTS ANYONE? What would be a funny name for a street name (that is a business's name)?
Monday, December 1, 2008
Mouse Angel (Sold for $47.00!)
Put this on top of the Christmas tree and your cats will eat it for sure.
http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=280288521021
Sunday, November 23, 2008
Now my dog is going to bite me for sure...
And I hated wearing Sponge Bob Band-aids to work, but this is worse...
Well, good thing I am unemployed.
http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=300275844921
This boy needs a hair cut! Mother is mad!
Hemp Kool-aid?
I always knew Mr. Kool-Aid Man was just a little too happy for some reason.
This drink mix has "Hydro Chronic Flavor." It has the flavor of marijuana without the THC.
http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=330288711993
Saturday, November 22, 2008
My God! World's Largest Lite-Brite is....
constructed of 124,418 Lite-Brite pegs. I have seen Jesus on toast, but never in Lite-Brite pegs.
http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=230306358792
8 minutes of Weightlessness for 4 Grand.
I think a vodka or a couple shots of tequila is a cheaper way to achieve weightlessness.
http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=330287692161
Friday, November 21, 2008
Thursday, November 20, 2008
Youtube Birthday Greeting from Chuckles the Bear
Isn't it nice to see drunk homeless men can make a living on eBay?
(just kidding)
http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=170278414692
Rare Babyland Topsy Turvy Doll- What the heck...
Maybe it is rare for a reason...
Wow people are bidding on this... thing.
http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=170280319817
Wednesday, November 19, 2008
Unopened Box from Cemetery!
The bid is up to $31.00! I wonder what's inside? Could it be my dead parakeets with their toys buried in the Tupperware containers?
"ODD BOX DUG UP NEXT TO CEMETERY! HEAVY! UNOPENED!"
http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=300273287860
"ODD BOX DUG UP NEXT TO CEMETERY! HEAVY! UNOPENED!"
http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=300273287860
Be a Fighter Pilot for a Day!
Seller is offering flight lessons for two. "Enter into a dog fight with your partner, where you and your guest are doing 90% of the flying! "
This is perfect for Trump and his ex-wives. I am afraid of the ski lift so I will sit this one out.
http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=280285157772
Conduct the Orchestra!
Don't like singing in front of a big crowd? Why not conduct one?
This is a very cool idea. I have never seen this before on eBay.
http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=330287456980
This is a very cool idea. I have never seen this before on eBay.
http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=330287456980
Tuesday, November 18, 2008
He's put drag queens to shame
The nightmare before Christmas.
http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?
ViewItem&item=110314181481
Here's another guy sticking his belly out.
http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?
ViewItem&item=400008794712
http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?
ViewItem&item=110314181481
Here's another guy sticking his belly out.
http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?
ViewItem&item=400008794712
GAWDY UGLY Christmas Sweater
I wonder if this guy drinks during all of his auctions.
"10 Santas have COTTON BALLS on their hats (handy in case of a nose bleed)."
http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?
ViewItem&item=380081712940
A search for "ugly Christmas sweater" (without the quotes) bestowed upon us 2,666 results! Of them, 434 are getting bids! Click here.
Monday, November 17, 2008
Cyber digital boyfriend revenge
Help this woman get revenge on her boyfriend. If Newman from Seinfeld sent in his pic with his shirt off, that would make this auction even funnier.
http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=290275487035
http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=290275487035
Sunday, November 16, 2008
Whoah 10,000 friends for only $160.
But are they really my friends? Like, will they lend me money and feed my cats?
http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=170276638515
A scary practical joke....
That is just as damaging to you as your friend.
http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=370107625166
Your favorite cuddly psychiatrist
I wish my therapist was this cute.
http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=110313660119
Also check out the finger puppet:
http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=130179620711
And the beanie baby:
http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=110304417709
I could rent it out to an ant.
Wow, I can own a whole inch of land. "You can give this exclusive, one-of-a-kind gift FOR ANY OCCASION!!!" How about a break-up or divorce?
What?!?! People are buying up these land deeds. (Click on "Purchases" in the auction.) I wonder how many will buy an inch of my messy room?
http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=190265215638
Thursday, November 13, 2008
Bid on a crazy name.
This lady from the UK will legally change her name for a year if you are the winning bidder. The bid is up to 1,000 GBP ($1500 USD).
I wonder if Tom Cruise, Demi Moore, and Gwyneth Paltrow remembered to bid. I am sure they could top Surrey, Rumor, Scout, and Apple.
She says in her listing the UK "Deed Poll Service" (the people that can legally change names) are the highest bidders and they want to call her "Pudsey Bear."
http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=170277055128
Wednesday, November 12, 2008
Restrain Yourself!
Do you own a private psychiatric clinic in your home?
The seller is selling this "Locking Security Jumpsuit with Padded Mitts" because " it’s the wrong size." Hmmm...
http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=140279996222
Friday, November 7, 2008
Breast Art
"This painting was 100% painted by my (real) breasts.... If you require photo documentation of the process then please buy your 'art' from one of my copycat 'competitors.'"
I didn't learn that technique in art class.
http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=360103237005
Howie Mandel with a pancake on his head
All this painter does is sell paintings of famous people with pancakes on their heads. And he is getting bids.
I think this painting is fitting because I always thought "Deal or No Deal" was a flop.
http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=250318626470
Thursday, November 6, 2008
Pay this guy to wear Anti-Obama shirts for 4 years!
Some people don't like Obama and then some people really don't like Obama.
If he works with a boss who likes Obama, then I will pay him the big bucks to wear Anti-Obama shirts every day for four years. Otherwise, there is no fun in it for me.
http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=270297913014
Update: This auction has been pulled.
If he works with a boss who likes Obama, then I will pay him the big bucks to wear Anti-Obama shirts every day for four years. Otherwise, there is no fun in it for me.
http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=270297913014
Update: This auction has been pulled.
Crazy Classified Science Video
In 1943, a top secret experiment called "The Philadelphia Project" was conducted to make a naval ship invisible. (That is all true.) Some say the project was to create a mirage of some kind or fool underwater magnetic mines. And then others say the experiment was to actually transport the ship forward in time. This crazy video thinks the later.
"[The scientists] were able to find a time vortex that would tunnel them back and forth between 1983 and 1943. This vortex was about 5 miles in diameter and could teleport you as far as 100 light years away..."
"If someone were teleported back into time say 3 minutes, they would eventually meet themselves and explode."
"Al Bielek's conscious was put into another child's body after birth."
I always wanted to know what it was like to trip on acid.
http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=360105177586
Casket Liquidation
Are you going to die soon because this seller needs to get rid of 50 coffins fast. The seller suggests "Novelty use as a large Ice Chest or convert it into a smoker or grill!"
I hope they mean before you put the body in it.
http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=120324975191
Obama Newspapers sell for big money.
The day after the election, everyone scurried over to their local newsstand to buy a newspaper with Obama on it. For patriotism and posterity? No, so they can scalp them on eBay for as high as $99 a piece!
http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=120329640267
The listing below warns "THESE ARE LEGIT COPIES BEWARE OF FAKE NEWS PAPERS BEING SOLD ON EBAY!!!" Yeah, I can see it now.
Everyone, run to your xerox machines. We are going to print fake newspapers. C'mon.
http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=220307428298
Thursday, October 30, 2008
Sarah Palin Cabbage Patch Doll!
Now your child can cuddle and drool all over the vice president.
In keeping true to reality, this special doll has lifelike features Sarah Palin has such as a pudgy nose, big cheeks, and cellulite on the knees.
http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=200267359418
This doll finally sold for $19,000! Gulp! I should have sold my balding Cabbage Patch on eBay and said it was McCain.
Sponsor: Join Freebie Force for free restaurant meals and free samples every month without gimmicks or scams. Check it out! http://www.freebieforce.com/karenica
Wednesday, October 29, 2008
It's bad enough I have flying bugs in my room. I don't need flying alarm clocks.
Now you can be extra sure you will wake up in the morning since the sounds of broken glass and falling books should do the trick .
"You'll have to find the helicopter first, before you can turn it off." Ut oh, I can't find that thing in my mess of a room.
I don't have any problems waking up in the morning. I simply wake up in the afternoon.
http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=280262667486
How would this look under your Christmas tree?
Not your usual golf game. This is a great way for guys to get revenge on women for tying up the bathroom.
http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=270292931960
http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=270292931960
Enough with the toast already!
Enough!
http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=350015252552
Sponsor: Do you shop on eBay? Get a rebate back when you shop! click here
http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=350015252552
Sponsor: Do you shop on eBay? Get a rebate back when you shop! click here
Sorry kid, we made the dog into an ottoman...
Well I guess it is better than leaving Fluffy at the SPCA.
The seller calls it "retro" but what he really means is "must go."
http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=370103017293
I guess the real estate market is real slow....
'Cause now people are selling plots of land in heaven.
Hey people are buying this. Check the seller's feedback file.
Hurry up before it sells out.
Makes a great gift for crooked CEOs of big banks and Fox News Network.
http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=270292030889
Hey people are buying this. Check the seller's feedback file.
Hurry up before it sells out.
Makes a great gift for crooked CEOs of big banks and Fox News Network.
http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=270292030889
I'm a Genie in a Bottle.
The seller claims a real live genie comes out of this bottle and the bid is past $100.
"After your wish is granted burn some incense for him! He loves sandlewood and opium." Yeah, somebody was sniffing too much opium before she wrote this listing.
http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=180301418942
Do you still suck your thumb?
Then you should get this Sterling Silver Thumb Guard. Unless you mind barbed wire in your teeth.
Why do people buy thumb guards anyway? Just use corn dogs or wrap the thumb in duct tape like I do.
http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=310095900347
Why do people buy thumb guards anyway? Just use corn dogs or wrap the thumb in duct tape like I do.
http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=310095900347
Somebody hacked the Easy Button!
The seller recommends many funny sayings to record but we don't recommend "Will you marry me?" unless your name is Clinton and you want every office secretary in the building.
http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=120325582223
Well, this guy had a weird college thesis paper...
This book is titled "Is Arsenic an Aphrodisiac?" In it the author answers questions like "How toxic is arsenic anyway?" but not "How do you sell 30 books mixing poison and love for $100 a piece?"
I see dead people.
http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=180294021496
A Sad Clown and His Young Monkey Lover
Why don't people just paint flowers anymore?
http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=350117504660
Tuesday, October 28, 2008
Tell the politicians to eat dirt and mean it.
Clean Dirt for sale
While it is true that eating clean dirt alleviates colitis, nausea, and other stomach ailments, I think I will stick with the yucky pink stuff.
"[Dirt is] often baked or fried in vinegar and pepper." Mmm yummy.
Well, this is as close as I am getting to the South.
http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=230304110783
Mug with Diamond Ring Handle
Funny gag to play on a wannabe bride... unless you are the wannabe bride.
http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=350117141670
http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=350117141670
Who knew produce shopping could be so profitable?
What do you see when you look at this apple?
A) John McCain
B) Conan O'Brien
C) George Bush
D) Somebody's Butt
E) All of the Above
If you answered D or E you are correct!
Silly? Yes. But it sure beats burnt toast.
http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=230304232316
A) John McCain
B) Conan O'Brien
C) George Bush
D) Somebody's Butt
E) All of the Above
If you answered D or E you are correct!
Silly? Yes. But it sure beats burnt toast.
http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=230304232316
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